A New Stage

With the beginning of school this year my family has entered a new stage of life. It is more of a change than I thought it would be. It includes a schedule change for when I work as well as a few parenting adjustments. It will only be for a short while, but even when it is over, we will be on to a different life stage that will have its on set of changes…

so…

For now, we are adjusting to this one…

and here are a few thoughts about this new stage we are in…

1. More than ever it is important for my wife and I to spend time/be involved in our middle schooler’s life. The sheltering days are coming to a close and that is ok, it must happen. As she experiences different things that come with maturity, we want to be there to help and guide. We are now entering into a stage of parenting where influence with our child will be more important than our position of authority as her parents. As she becomes more independent, influence not force will win the day. This means we will spend more time talking with her and doing things with her. The goal is to make our community at home a strong one… the stronger the relationship, the stronger the influence. We need to make sure ours is strong.

2. My youngest is still in Elementary School and even though the playing field has changed for my oldest we must not forget to parent him the same way we parented her during her Elementary School days. They will not be in the same life stage again until High School(and even then it will be different). The balance between their two life stages is something we must keep in mind as we interact with them.

We can’t sacrifice the connection with the younger to connect with the older and vise versa.

3. God must be central through all of this. Christ must be the focus of our family life (yes.. even when we are away from church). This is the way it is in all stages in life and now with these new experiences… it is a focus on Christ that will keep her out of trouble.

The way Nicole and I live in front of her is now, more important than it ever has been. Only Christ can help us act correctly. If we do not want her to do something, we must make sure we are not doing it. This includes what we say.

4. The stage will shift, day to day, week to week, as she changes. This is the natural progression of things. Kids are supposed to grow up, go to middle school and beyond. This means they are healthy, and still with us. I am thankful for that.

So we are on a new stage, the lights are on and the camera is rolling… and you maybe too. Yes… Its time to act… the show has started.

My prayer is we will remain true to Christ and faithful to parenting our kids from where they are to where they need to go.

There is nothing more important.

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3 comments

  1. Great thoughts and tough adjustments….we are seeing that with my nephews…one is in his senior year and it kills me because it just seemed like yesterday he was Hunter’s age. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  2. praying for your family. having my children (at the least first 2) transition to middle school was way more difficult than when they started elementary school or even when the oldest started high school. the middle school years are tough for our kids and yes, it is crucial for us as parents not to start acting but to live out an authentic faith!

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