I’m Sorry


I’m Sorry Lord…

Really

And I know you have heard those words from my mouth before

Time and time again for the same sin

in fact…

I’m Sorry, that I’m sorry

I did not want to be in this position again, sometimes I wonder what is wrong with me

You have been so good to me and my family and have extended grace more than I want to admit…

more times than I can calculate

So

I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry

It seems that the first chance I get I go back to the unholy things in life, my guard goes down and I wind up doing them…

without thinking…

without considering the price

addicted to the emotion of it all

the rush

the power

the pleasure

the “confidence”

justifying myself in the moments before and during

feeling reckless after it is all said and done…

carrying shame, regret, and guilt over the pain I’ve caused

to you and to others…

I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry.

I know you forgive, but the consequences for what I have done still exist in the hearts of others, in the destruction that I’ve brought into existence and in my own mind

I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry, that I’m sorry.

What I’m asking for at this moment is more than just forgiveness…

it is for you to move and do what ever it takes to help me get this out of my life…

for though I’m thankful that you forgive

I want this out of my life and I can’t do it alone

I don’t want to be sorry anymore.

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One comment

  1. The roots of this comes from a conversation I had with someone yesterday, only they and I know who and what. They kept saying “I just want to stop doing this and I keep failing.” They are not the first to say this to me, and in fact I have felt this way too. The truth is we need the power of God in our lives, we need His help and its available if we ask with the desire to turn from our wicked ways.(2 Chronicles 7:14) Only His power breaks trough the power of sin in our lives.

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